Not A Lot

18 Jan

It has been snowing in Portsmouth so I ain’t seen much because I didn’t fancy going out much. Instead I seen some house sparrows in my mum’s garden in Portsmouth and some black-headed gulls in my garden in Portsmouth. I do not like Portsmouth. But at least it isn’t Birmingham.

House sparrows in my mum's garden.

House sparrows in my mum’s garden.

Black-headed gulls in my garden.

Black-headed gulls in my garden.

The thing that struck me was that gull on the right who almost has his summer plumage going already. I asked him about it and he said that he’d been reading about global warming in the tabloids and thought summer should be here soon and all the vicious female gulls told him he was stupid but he said they’d see in the end but then he woke up this morning and there was snow everywhere and he felt a right fool. That’s why he’s stood on his own not eating the crackers I chucked up on the garage roof; he’s developed an eating disorder through the mental stress of it all. Serves him right, really.

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