Robin facts

14 Dec

Today I gone up the Farlingtons and seen a robin.

A robins.

A robins.

It is a FACT that you only ever seen a robin at Christmastime. The rest of the year, they do not exist.

Here are some other robin FACTS to help you celebrate Jehovah The God doing dirties with a fourteen year old girl.

1. The story of Robin Hood is based on the real life story of an Afro-American robin struggling to escape the ghetto. The original title of the story was Robin In Da Hood.

2. Robins are the only member of the bird family to deny the holocaust. But they do it in such a chipper fashion, nobody minds.

3. The 1958 song “Rockin’ Robin” by Bobby Day is not about robins at all. It is in fact about a blood splattered sparrow, in a state of shock, rocking back and forth in the corner muttering “What have I done?” over and over.

4. Sandra Bullock played the robin in the original stage show of Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Musical. The role was immediately axed because she seemed more like a nuthatch, ruining the narrative and upsetting the RSPB.

5. Robins actually fly backwards, but because their arses look like faces no one has ever noticed.

I also seen these:

Stonechat

Stonechat

Part of a bearded tit. Not even a good part.

Part of a bearded tit. Not even a good part.

Here's what I reckon the rest of the bearded tit would look like if you could see it.

Here’s what I reckon the rest of the bearded tit would look like if you could seen it.

Marsh harrier in Farsmudge Mode.

Marsh harrier in Farsmudge Mode.

Lapwings

Lapwings

Kestrel

Kestrel

Black tailed gobshites

Black tailed gobshites

Oliver Reed Bunting.

Oliver Reed Bunting. Drunk. Ruining “Wogan”.

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One Response to “Robin facts”

  1. Suzanna December 15, 2013 at 3:05 pm #

    Thank you for fulfilling my previous christmas wish 🙂

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